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Widower: Experiences All the Same??
WSN-MO: Widower to Widower with Fred Colby One thing I have learned since my wife passed over three years ago, is that much in my experience has common elements with that of other widowers, but we each also have some very unique components in our individual journeys. Discovering our common elements provides comfort and encouragement […]
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Grieving is hard. It’s Sad. It’s a lot of work!
Grieving is hard. It’s sad. It’s a lot of work! After Tony died, if anyone had said to me, “There will ultimately be a positive side to his sudden death” – I think I would have punched them in the nose. What I’ve learned since then through my own resilience (and the resilience I see […]
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Widower: Financial Land Mines
My father died when he was 33 years of age, so I realized the importance of getting my finances in order while still young. I bought life insurance, started an IRA investment account, wrote a will, and made sure that my wife was the primary beneficiary. During one period (2008 – 2012) I was sure […]
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The Pursuit of Happiness
As widowed men, each of us has experienced a significant wound. This wound like any other will take time to heal. The time it takes for this wound to heal is unique to each one of us. Many of us will however at some point experience the healing of this wound to the point where […]
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How to find joy again
“Am I a joy to be around?” Many people seek joy in their lives and wonder why they don’t attract it. In widowhood, it’s easy to get locked in a downward cycle. The less joy you feel, the more hopeless things can look. You may long to be rescued from this (by yourself or by […]
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Widower: Anger – Fight It or Accept It?
Shortly after my wife’s death, I went to the mountains by myself for a week and screamed as loud and often as I wanted to. But now, 3 ½ years later, I no longer feel the intensity of anger I felt then. I soon forget how easy it was to cut myself off from others […]
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A Widower’s Wake-up Call
By Herb Knoll Author: The Widower’s Journey “The entire floor misses your laughter,” said the young female staff member standing at my office door. It had been just four months since my bride, Michelle Knoll, had earned her angel wings following her 39 month battle against pancreatic cancer. She died on March 7, 2008. “They’re […]
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Men Need To Have Purpose
by Herb Knoll Author: The Widower’s Journey Men need to have a purpose in life. A reason to get up in the morning. Absent purpose, why live? I hear it in the voices and read it in the posts men make on “Widowers Support Network – Members Only” (WSN-MO), a FREE and private “men’s only” […]
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Fear-some Firsts
How to get through those hard anniversaries… that horrible first year I called them the “fierce-some firsts”: First Valentine’s Day. First Thanksgiving. First Christmas. First birthday (his). My birthday First birthday (the children’s). First “day we met”. First wedding anniversary. First angle-versary (anniversary of death). During that first year, as these “firsts” approached, I’d count […]
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