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Growth and Gain
“From Grieving to Greatness” is what I am calling it. I look in the mirror, and I am not the same man I was two and a half years ago. I have evolved. Please do not get me wrong; I am most definitely still grieving Suzanne and always will. Over these last two and a…
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A Message for a Widower’s Friends and Family
A kind word can save a widower. Amazing, but true! When a widower is buried in grief, just one kind word from someone can make their grief bearable and make their chances of surviving their grief intact more likely. More than once, a friend called me at just the right time and offered kind words…
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Can you see and be the Lights?
On January 20th, 2021 a precocious 22-year-old African -American woman told a divided and grief-stricken nation “We can grow as we Grieve”. I like most people was awe-struck by her profound wisdom that far exceeds her youth. My purpose in writing is to examine her poem as she speaks to us about grief and sheds…
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#466: What It’s Like to Become a Widower | The Art of Manliness
What’s it like for a man to lose the person at the very center of his life — his wife? Maybe you know firsthand, because you’ve lost a spouse yourself. Or maybe you know a friend or family member who’s a widower, and have wondered what he’s going through and how to help him. Or…
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LIFE HAPPENS WHILE YOU’RE BUSY MAKING OTHER PLANS
This is the famous quote from John Lennon. As I sat down to write this, that quote came to mind because I never expected things to go the way they’ve gone. Yes, we all hated the pandemic that seems to have no end, the uncertainty of the virus’s danger, the inability to be with family…
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Glitter
We all have memories. Sometimes we want to bring these memories to the forefront of our thoughts, and other times they are best suited tucked away in the back of our minds. Some of these memories are fond and happy, but honestly, some of these memories are sad or scary. I will be the first…
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Brothers: We Still Have a Purpose
For many of you, this title strikes you as a bit rhetorical. For others, you may take one look and discount this notion entirely. My brothers welcome to one of the many complex aspects of being a widower. Early in my widowhood, I found myself completely unprepared to deal with the difficulty I had with…
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Dash
March 28, 1959 ~ April 5, 2018. There is so much about my late wife Lorna’s life that you really can’t signify it by placing a dash between her first breath and her last breath. The Pastor mentioned it at her celebration of life. The dash represents decades, represents learning, loving, serving, raising a family,…
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Decluttering
By Jeff Ziegler Today, I spent part of my day decluttering the kitchen and reorganizing my toolboxes. It was a bit cathartic. I threw a load of things out. And it got me thinking about how cluttered I have been feeling in my mind of late. Clutter is a funny thing. We “collect” knickknacks, and…
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Finding Help for Your Grief
Losing your wife is so all-encompassing that it may not be comparable to any other loss except possibly the death of a child. The complete intertwining of your life with your wife in marriage makes her death distinctly life-shattering and life-changing. For this reason, many men find they need both informal and formal help in…