Each day, millions of people wake up and start their day the same way they do every other day. Their life is a routine, their life has normalcy, and their presence is taken for granted. However, there is another group of people that have an adverse perspective of life. These people take nothing for granted. These are also people that yearn for normality and the previously mentioned routine that so many do without thought. These are the millions of widowers who wake up daily and do things that they once did without much effort.
There was a time in my life that I did these everyday tasks without much thought. I had a routine, and it was great. Coincidentally I took this routine for granted; there was no immunity to that mentality. The first few days and weeks and months of learning to be a widower is difficult. I could write pages of why it’s difficult, but that’s not the mission of this column. I am here to tell you about why it’s essential to get up each day and put one foot in front of the other and work your way towards being the new you. For some, it may be using positive affirmations in front of the mirror each morning. For others, it may be getting dressed and conquering the task of feeling like you are happy with who you see in the mirror after some personal grooming.
It’s important to remember that even though there are days that you may feel alone, you are not alone. Many, many other widowers are experiencing similar feelings to what you are feeling. There are also just as many widowers that want to and are willing to talk about those feelings. Everyone has days that are better than others, and by banding together, we can hold each other up. There’s nothing wrong or suspicious about a bad day. We all have them, and they are a part of the healing process. One mistake some of us make is to try to go through this alone when there are people and resources available.
We are a band of brothers with something in common. It’s a group we don’t want to be a part of, but here we are. Stay strong my brothers and hang in there, the sun will rise tomorrow.
Chris can be contacted at firstname.lastname@example.org