-
The Stupid Things They Say
by Dr. David Knapp PhD One big question concerning loss we all encounter regularly is “What do yo say to a friend or loved one when they experience severe loss?” I learned from personal experience that few would-be comforters are comfortable with helpful statements like “Your heart must be hurting right now.” Many have…
-
Familiar Places
Familiar Places I know this happens to you. As you travel around your town, you pass by many places that were once either special or routine to you and your late wife. If you’re like me, sometimes you pass by them absentmindedly. Other times it brings tears to your eyes. For me, the places are…
-
Widower Wearing Wedding Ring Sparks Huge Discussion
Recently I was asked to contribute to a discussion on this topic that attracted over 4,500 online comments. The topic was launched by a woman who confronted a widower about his wearing a wedding band eight months after his wife passed. The following article was featured on Bored Panda, an international online publication. Woman Confused…
-
Can You Heal While Living in the Past?
If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present. Lao Tzu (6th-century BC Chinese philosopher) When we first enter deep grieving after losing our wives, we often do everything we can think of to…
-
Home For the Holidays: 2021 Edition
This year I will be experiencing my 7th Christmas without my wife, Robyn. Every year our house would transform into a continuous theme of the current or upcoming holiday. Now, most of those decorations remain in the basement, and my annual complaint of having to haul the countless crates from the basement is no more.…
-
“Sometimes our healing happens when we change the way we relate to the things that will not change” – Vienna Pharaon
By Tom Peyton As I mentioned in a previous column, I receive daily inspirational quotes, and this one arrived not only from the site that sends them but forwarded as well from a high school classmate to me. They are both asking me to examine the quote and unravel its meaning. I will give it…
-
Widowers Need To Step Out of The Shadows and Into the Light of Day
By Herb Knoll Author: The Widower’s Journey Grieving men are misunderstood. And for a good reason. After all, men don’t believe they have permission to grieve in the first place. When a man experiences a loss, they frequently resort to their primitive behaviors, suggesting to those who will listen, “I’m fine,” Oh really? Is that…
-
Widower: Healthy vs. Unhealthy Grief
If you love someone and you lose them, you are going to grieve… there is no getting around it! But, is there a way to grieve that is healthy for you? Or a way that is unhealthy? Based on my own experience and what I have heard from hundreds of widower, the answer is a…
-
MOVING FORWARD
MOVING FORWARD When widows and widowers try to move forward with life, a multitude of feelings can suddenly make themselves known. These feelings vary a lot, depending on personality and situation. Here are some examples. See if any of these apply to you. Completely stuck. You have the best intentions, but repeatedly find yourself stuck.…
-
Boy’s Don’t Cry…right? WRONG! And That’s Okay
by Herb Knoll Author: The Widower’s Journey From the time little boys are first able to walk, in some cases even before they can walk, parents begin shaping the psyche of their sons by telling them, “Boys don’t cry. ” Oh really… who says so? Whoever it was, they should be picked up and prosecuted for the harm they…
Widowers Support Network 