-
Angels Walk Among Us
by Herb Knoll Author: The Widower’s Journey “Hi, my name is Richard.” Thus began my knowing a giant of a man named Richard Blount (62) as he sat down in the chair beside me. The occasion was my first meeting at GriefShare, a widely available program for those who have experienced a loss in their…
-
Widower: When Can I Stop Grieving?
When I ask former members of my Men’s Grief Group why they stopped coming to the group, the most common response is, “I just did not want to grieve anymore, and the groups became a downer after I had begun to feel better.” I often hear the same story from widows, who had stopped attending…
-
Finding Ms. Right.
By Herb Knoll Author: The Widower’s Journey Dating and finding Mrs. Right is not my expertise but I have a few thoughts on the topic. 1. What are you looking for? A wife? Someone to keep your life organized and your house clean. A lover? A spouse? Or just a replacement? Given what you truly…
-
MOVING FORWARD
MOVING FORWARD When widows and widowers try to move forward with life, a multitude of feelings can suddenly make themselves known. These feelings vary a lot, depending on personality and situation. Here are some examples. See if any of these apply to you. Completely stuck. You have the best intentions, but repeatedly find yourself stuck.…
-
WIDOWER: NEW RELATIONSHIPS
While being prepped for an emergency hernia operation four months after my wife’s death, I instructed the doctors three times that I wanted a “Do Not Resuscitate” order in place. I saw this as an opportunity to rejoin my wonderful wife of 45 years. Many hours later ― I woke up! The immediate question that…
-
Boy’s Don’t Cry…right? WRONG! And That’s Okay
by Herb Knoll Author: The Widower’s Journey From the time little boys are first able to walk, in some cases even before they can walk, parents begin shaping the psyche of their sons by telling them, “Boys don’t cry. ” Oh really… who says so? Whoever it was, they should be picked up and prosecuted for the harm they…
-
The Mark Ramey Group: Speaking to the Founder of the Widowers Support Network
There are millions of widowers in the United States alone, and many of them feel like they have no one to turn to. One in every five men will be widowed, and the suicide rate among them is three to four times higher than that of married men. These are just a few reasons why…
-
Widower 101: More Key Learnings
Recently I shared four things that I have learned since becoming a widower. In this article, I would like to continue to share a few additional thoughts on this issue. For each one of us, this list may be different. As I write in my book The First 365, a loss is the ultimate designer…
-
Grief is Love
Three years ago, I would have used the following words to define “grief:” physical and emotional pain, suffering, anguish, cruelty, punishment, abandonment, loss of self, guilt, misery, and loneliness. I experienced all of these, and I saw no way to survive them or to become whole again. I found the same to be true of…
-
Lifeboat Supplies
It’s important to have a ‘lifeboat’ prepared for those hard times. In a recent post, I talked about how I like to visualize my mood as a buoy in the sea. There have been times in my life when ocean waves would wash over my buoy, but then it would always pop back up. When…