Life is Best When Lived In Pencil – Part 2

Change, change, change. The only constant seems to be change. In a recent column, I shared that I am considering moving back to the area where I was raised. That’s a huge change for me. That’s getting out the pencil and erasing some plans that had previously been considered to be permanent. It’s good, though, because it’s part of a bigger picture. The bigger picture is about looking out for ourselves. It’s about doing what is right for us. It’s about the fact that now is our time to practice self-care.

Now is the time to be self-aware and tend to our needs. The grief journey is exhausting. For many of us, the grief journey followed a season of caregiving for our sick spouses. That’s a daunting task in itself. We did it without regret or remorse. It was done with the utmost of love and honor for our girls. Now, however, is our time and our turn. Here’s what that means for me. I’ve been a selfless person for all my adulthood. That manifested itself during Joyce’s illness and eventual death. Even after her passing, I found myself continuing in that role. It’s not a bad thing. I’ve learned that it’s ok to be selfless and selfish. I was sharing this thought with a friend the other day. They reminded me of the announcement on all airline flights that says, “ put your own mask on first” It makes sense. We can’t be good to anyone unless we are good to ourselves. We can’t fill anyone’s cup or encourage them unless we are dealing from a place of emotional and physical well-being. For those of us with adult children, they need us. We need to care for ourselves so that we can be around for them. For those with children still at home, take the above and multiply it by 10. You need to be Superman. You can’t do that if you’re running on empty. I’ll be submitting some additional columns on this subject over the next few weeks. I’ll share some things that are working for me and some that haven’t worked at all. We’re all in this together. We’re all working toward a common goal, which is moving forward. Just take it one step at a time, one day at a time. And remember… Put your oxygen mask on first!


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