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I WAS SUPPOSED TO DIE FIRST!
Almost every widower I have met, emailed, or spoken to has said this to me at some point. I certainly felt that way after my wife passed in 2015. We both had some health challenges during our lifetime. Still, mine were the more serious and recent ones, so it was a big surprise for both…
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Past, Present, and Future
First, let me preface this and say I probably have no original thoughts about being a widower. I only have my experiences and what I have learned by reading books, watching videos, and speaking to people on the Widower’s Support Network. I am positive that many of us have felt these very same feelings.…
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Spring Ahead with Gratitude
Spring weather has finally arrived for those of us who live in the Northeastern part of the United States. In Upstate New York, the last vestiges of snow are disappearing, and I can see glimpses of slightly green grass. Warmer temperatures will change my mood after a long winter of cold and dark days. However,…
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All About Our Cars
I was in a position like many of you. What to do with the car that your late wife drove? I actually like the car. It’s a 2018 Audi A5 Sportback. It’s CPO. It has beautiful lines, is quick as can be, and drives so smoothly, as a touring car should. She kept a scrunchy…
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#UpspiralGrief with Herb Knoll
Herb Knoll is a former banking executive turned widower advocate. Herb lost his bride, Michelle Knoll in 2008 to pancreatic cancer. He soon discovered there was few resources available for widowers in dealing with their grief. He resigned his position and rededicated his life to helping widowed men. Herb published his book, The Widower’s Journey…
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When Widows or Widowers Feel Like They Are Cheating – What Do You Do?
When your new widow girlfriend feels like she is cheating on her deceased husband, what do you do? Or maybe you are the one feeling like you are cheating on your dead wife. Are these feelings normal? How do you deal with this without blowing up your new relationship? Before entering a new serious relationship,…
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Life Is Best When Lived In Pencil – Part 4
I just got home from church. A wonderful message was presented by the minister today centered on the fact that even if life doesn’t take you where you think it will, you’ll still be OK. He told us that life can still be good even when our plans get changed, our dreams get dashed and…
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Metamorphosis
I have recently experienced my first grief support group. It was a baptism by fire. The hospice for which I volunteer is a large one. It is the practice of hospices to provide bereavement support to survivors of hospice patients. Leading this support is the bereavement coordinator, a licensed clinical social worker, and a small…
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Playing Not To Lose
by David W. Welday March Madness is here! Whether or not you follow college basketball, it’s hard not to be aware that the NCAA college basketball tournament (affectionately known as “March Madness”) is happening. In our family we all fill out a bracket…some of us take it seriously while others fill out their bracket…
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What is the biggest regret you had after your spouse died? – And how are you using it to help yourself heal?
The title of my article is based on a question recently posed by our Founder, Herb Knoll, to a group of widowers. It is both a challenging and painful question to answer, but it can also be a helpful tool in healing. I don’t propose any clear-cut way to answer the question; it’s purely subjective,…