Author: Terrell Whitener

  • Settling into Singleness

    When not having the privilege of submitting articles to this outstanding group of men, I enjoy reading the exceptional content provided by other writers as well as reading your questions and thoughts. One of the common issues that seem to foster many conversations is dating and new relationships as a widower. Last week I experienced […]

  • Life, Love and Moving Forward

    February 28th will mark the fourth anniversary of the passing of my wife, Robyn. In so many ways it seems like much longer than four years. I wanted to take a few moments to reflect on a few of the things that I have learned during this period. I have often referred to this time […]

  • The Other Side of Love and Respect

    In 2004 Dr. Emerson Eggerich wrote a ground-breaking book titled “Love and Respect.” In this book, Dr. Eggerich brilliantly wrote about the innate need for women to feel loved and men to desire respect. I will never forget when I initially read that book feeling like “yeah, that’s it.” I also remember feeling that Dr. […]

  • Living In-Between?

    Many of us have a natural inclination to do the things that we feel we do well. I, in many ways, have found aspects of widowhood very much like that. Last week I experienced what would have been my 19th wedding anniversary and the celebration of 25 years together with my late wife. Periodically I […]

  • Letter to An Old Friend

    Recently, while doing my dishes, I decided to take the time to write a letter to an old friend. Though we have had the opportunity to talk here and there, it always seems like the thoughts shared are just fleeting most of the time. I find that one of the best ways of catching up […]

  • When Memories Are Not Enough: Finding Common Ground with Fate

    What do you do when memories are not enough? This is a question that many who have experienced the loss of someone significant in their lives have to come to grips with after a period pass. You find yourself repeating the same stories and referencing your loved to the same person or persons repeatedly. Though […]

  • Why I Still Love My Life

    Recently I received the gift of a significant breakthrough in my life. But first, a little background. Fifty-two months ago, on a cold February morning, I was driving to the hospital, suitcase in tow to bring my wife home from another incident avoided. You see, I was very used to adjusting our routine with a […]

  • Life 2.0

    Recently I viewed an interview with author and political pundit David Brooks. During this interview, he was reflecting on a shift in his thinking when it came to his priorities in life. He termed this new way of thinking as his “second mountain.” In many ways, many of us who have lost a spouse or […]

  • Widower 101: More Key Learnings

    Recently I shared four things that I have learned since becoming a widower. In this article, I would like to continue to share a few additional thoughts on this issue. For each one of us, this list may be different. As I write in my book The First 365, a loss is the ultimate designer […]

  • The Pursuit of Happiness

    As widowed men, each of us has experienced a significant wound. This wound like any other will take time to heal. The time it takes for this wound to heal is unique to each one of us. Many of us will however at some point experience the healing of this wound to the point where […]