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Grief opens the mind to that we cannot explain
Last week Larry Aherns, one of our brother’s shared a short inspirational piece entitled: “A shout out to everyone who is trying right now” by S.C. Lourie. Lourie is an author and blogger from the U.K. who writes of hope to all who have suffered a loss. She suffered a miscarriage a few years ago…
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The Grief Club: My strength and hope
I never imagined that I would be a member of this group at age sixty-three. It’s a group no one wants to join, but circumstances, the loss of a loved one, put me into this club. You and I are part of a group of strangers, most of whom we would never have…
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Surviving the Holidays
Commercials and advertisements between late October until December 24th tell us it’s the most wonderful time of the year. It’s the time to buy presents, share gifts and celebrate the joy of being with your loved ones. It can be a painful, sad, and overwhelming time for those who have suffered a loss. It runs…
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Thankful for a Life Well Lived
About a week ago I saw an interview conducted with Steven Roberts husband, widower and best- selling author of a new book about his late wife Cokie Roberts entitled Cokie Roberts: A Life Well Lived. At the start of the interview the interviewer spoke about the impact Cokie Roberts had on her life as a…
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Transitional Objects
Last week I saw a story on the news about a woman who lost her 94-year-old father after he battled an illness for a short time. The woman reflected on the task that many of us have dreaded: sorting through her father’s belongings and then deciding what and to whom you want to give them.…
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The Fall Season -Nature is Splendiferous!
Splendiferous is a real word that captures the essence of the Fall season. It speaks of the beauty, glamour, majesty, and any adjective you can think of that describes the magnificence of the season. I am blessed to live in Upstate New York. The fall season is the best time of the year. For my…
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The Healing Power of a Group
by Tom Peytom Recently I met with an old friend I worked with many years ago at a diner near my home for dinner. We were both excited since I had not seen him in about five years. During our dinner, he asked the question that so many friends and acquaintances often pose to me;…
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What do I do with my loved one’s clothing
It’s the question we widowers and widows must one day face. It is like the other questions we encounter as we move forward in life. Do I continue to wear my wedding ring? Do I stay in my house or apartment or move to another place of residence? Do I choose to date or choose…
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Showing up to Grief
By Tom Peyton The filmmaker Woody Allen is credited with the saying, “80 percent of success is simply showing up.” Over time it got changed to 90 percent. The percentage is not essential; instead, the two simple words: showing up to me are most important. I am almost 15 months into the Widowers’ Journey. At…
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“Sometimes our healing happens when we change the way we relate to the things that will not change” – Vienna Pharaon
By Tom Peyton As I mentioned in a previous column, I receive daily inspirational quotes, and this one arrived not only from the site that sends them but forwarded as well from a high school classmate to me. They are both asking me to examine the quote and unravel its meaning. I will give it…
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